Part A: How I Managed Early Construction As A Woman

Photo Credit: Verbally Disastrous on Spotify

Hello Everyone!

Side Note: I have been busy working on writing out and editing the upcoming podcast content. I have been wrapped up in other things as well. I have loaded the podcast episode that mirrors the work below. This has been split up into two parts: Episode #12: Part A & Episode #13: Part B. Melissa and I teamed up yesterday and did a podcast episode #14. I will share that as soon as I finish editing it. I decided to write about how hard life was like as an apprentice electrician as a woman back in the 1990’s in New York. For more details than what is offered in these two podcast episodes #12 & #13, you will have to go find the book #ConstructionTales on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, iTunes, and Audible. Here is the content below as well as part B in the next post I am uploading now.

When I reflect on first becoming a female electrician, my career path was chosen when I was a teenager. It all started when I went with my dad to the recruiter’s offices in the mall to find my career. My dad had to sign my documents for the military since I was 17-years old and considered underage. I had taken the ASVAB back when I was 16-years old in the summer before my senior year. I had chosen the U.S. Navy Seabees since my aunt and uncle are veterans. The bonus was having a job I can use in the future as a civilian. My goal was to also make good money and have a retirement. The recruiter was rattling off some job openings for me. I remember hearing a choice of being either a construction electrician or an airplane mechanic on an aircraft carrier. For whatever reason, I didn’t remember the other options. Perhaps that was because I narrowed it down to deciding between two great options.

I figured an electrician sounds like a cool job with a future so let’s go with that option. I remember the recruiter telling me that the program was intense. I was under an impression that I was strong and smart and could tackle anything thrown my way. After all, my dad used to remind me of that very often. I had spent a few summers in my dad’s truck shop helping to clean up, sort hardware, watch him work on the trucks, and even drive the 18-wheelers into the bays myself. I even got the opportunity to drive an 18-wheeler on the main road. That work had given me such a huge boost of confidence. It didn’t occur to me, at that time when I made the choice, that I would choose a path that would give me many challenges to face. I didn’t think I was entering a “man’s” occupation. I thought I was smart and strong enough to accomplish anything I put my mind to doing. I faced the challenges, worked hard to learn, and changed some minds along the way.

I spent my bootcamp in Orlando, Florida fresh out of high school. What an idiot!! I came from a coastal town with mild weather in Oregon. I had never been on a plane before. I had never been to a tropical location. I remember getting off the plane being hit with heat and humidity! Ugh!! I remember thinking how terrible the moisture felt on my face!! In hindsight, I am grateful that my dad used to push me with the running each night during my senior year. Being fit helped me adjust to the heat and humidity from June to August! I remember girls falling out from the heat during our daily runs. Some girls had to take an ambulance since they were so dehydrated and physically distressed. The hard work during my senior year also helped me to win the ironwoman competition from my company of 89 women! People from the military will know what achievement that is. I took great pride in those bragging rights. I remember competing with an African American girl, named Bratcher from Harlem, where we were doing clapping pushups at night before bed. I was a kid from a sheltered home life and didn’t know about the whole “white versus black” thing. I saw the women in my company try to segregate themselves and I didn’t understand why. I vibed very well with these southern girls who were tough and the tough girl from New York. I didn’t feel the need to follow these people’s clicks based solely on my external similarities. I am still that way to this day (shrug shoulders).

I was an absolute beast with my fitness by the time I graduated boot camp! I started learning how to lift weights my senior year. Prior to starting, I had no idea how naturally strong I am. I remember leg pressing my max at 550 lbs. and benching pressing at 220 lbs. by the time I graduated. I had absolutely no clue what I was capable of doing. I have a plaque on the wall in my high school for bench pressing the most for women. I got word from someone in my family that it is still in my high school gym. Once I graduated from boot camp, it was time to head to Port Hueneme, California for A school. I learned about electrical theory and how to climb 45-foot wooden utility poles with gaffs and climbing gear. Now that was a physically demanding task! I remember my nickname was “pickles” in A school since it pokes fun at my maiden name. I remember the trainers yelling at me “go pickles” while pole climbing. Each time, my shirt uniform was absolutely soaked from both fear and physical exertion. Once you are done with climbing, you go with your class and run 5 miles each day after climbing sessions. While climbing, you inadvertently use your upper body to hold the pole which is an unnecessary waste of your upper body. The upper body soreness is intense! There were eight women in my class and only three of us made it out of the A school for graduation. By this point, I did not experience any pushback on my career choice. The program was very physically rigorous and if you got through it, you were meant to be there. I got my papers and went on over to Guantanamo Bay, Cuba for my first duty station. The military base really feels small and isolated with the fence surrounding the base after a period of time. I originally intended on retiring from the Navy after 20 years. I met my husband, he was a U.S. Marine, on the base and my plans changed drastically.

We got engaged only a few months after meeting, got married, and I found out I was expecting my first child. I requested to get out of the military and was approved (to my surprise). I relocated to New York with my new family. I worked for a little bit for a non-union shop. The hours were long and the particular light retrofit work forced us to work overnight. That made life rough for a mother with a newborn. I applied and got into the union known as Local #3 IBEW and became an apprentice not long after applying. The apprenticeship is paid training and lasts for 5-1/2 years. You also go to school at night on your own time and learn electrical theory. The contractors collectively pay for your education. I was the only girl in my class and the only girl often on jobsites. It felt weird to see another female on the job. By this point, this is the first time where I really felt the tentacles of discrimination. I would sit in class and the guys would totally ignore me, not interact, and not even look my way. I felt somewhat uncomfortable yet didn’t give up. I was dirty from the job and found a shower at a college, cleaned up, and would head to a second job after class ended. In hindsight, the classmates probably saw me dressed up with makeup and didn’t think highly of me. I imagine that their first impression of me, since I came to class clean and dressed up, was that I was looking for a husband and not trying to work.

I had to pick up two and three jobs for a few years to survive after my husband died six months into my apprenticeship. Boy did this event totally throw me off my game. I had given myself a week off from work after his death. I wiped my nose, picked myself up by the boot straps, and used work as a means to occupy my mind. For a few years, I worked at least two jobs and had worked as much as 120 hours per week. This was when my first job was working overtime. I had a second job that was flexible where I worked on the telephone calling people up until midnight selling products or services on the west coast. My son went to go stay with family for a bit so I could work the hours and try to catch up. As a first-year apprentice, I was making $9/hr. and pulling in $265/wk and paying a babysitter $150/wk. For the first few years, I felt like I was working to pretty much just pay the babysitter. I can only imagine what it is like for a person on minimum wage to not expect a big pay increase in time. The big pay increase had given me hope that this struggle was only temporary. I remember so many times wanting to quit, pack up, and go back to live with my family in Oregon. I had no furniture in my house and had to put things on layaway over time to acquire basic household items. I felt like a walking zombie where I was endlessly tired. I used to fall asleep at the wheel during red lights. I can say that I know how to budget, cook from scratch, cut corners in my household, and get the most bang for my buck! I can multi-task like it is no one’s business too! There are some positives to any struggle you face in life.

I didn’t say anything to my classmates; I just my instructor and apprentice director of the tragedy. Years later, that omission is something that my classmates grilled me about not sharing my struggle as a widow. I looked at it like you males think I am weak and not worthy of even being here amongst you. I would think that sentiment would be fueled even further by seeing me crying about becoming a widow. I had car problems a few times during my apprenticeship. That was rough since I needed to travel over 100 miles a day to get between both jobs and home. I had asked a classmate I figured lived near me for a ride. It took a lot of courage to even ask for help. He turned me down so I got home the best way that I could. I did a ton of walking when I endured car problems. The funny thing is that he felt guilty about it later on. I hold no grudges with anyone. Holding onto that kind of negative energy is not good for my soul. I did a ton of walking back during that journey and burned some calories. In hindsight, it was good for me considering I was eating a super carb laden cheap diet of rice and pasta. Once in a while, my mother-in-law would help me out with things if I was struggling. She didn’t owe me and I love her dearly for her guidance and tough talks. Sadly, my parents didn’t bother looking my way to offer any help. In all fairness, my mother said I could move in with them. I wanted to stay put, keep my house that I had bought, and finish my apprenticeship. My journey has indeed made me the strong woman that I am today.

I learned the art of sarcasm, ball breaking, and sharp retorts from watching my coworkers go back and forth with each other. As the young woman on the job, the guys would either try to totally ignore me, say smart ass stuff, or take me under their wing. I learned early on that showing my humorous side was a good way to break the ice and make the guys feel more comfier around me. I remember trying out my ball breaking skills at my first work Christmas party in a bar with open bar. One of my coworkers, named *Steve, was bringing drinks to some women in the bar and being such a lady’s man. Steve walks towards me with women flanked on both sides of him. I act like I am just meeting him for the first time and approach him with open arms to give him a hug. I say, “hey Steve! How are you? How’s your kids? How’s your wife?” All of a sudden, the work crew around me collectively burst out laughing. They drown out Steve’s retort and the shock mixed with a smirk on his face was priceless! He yells at me, in a playful manner, “you’re mine on Monday!” Of course, I retort, “but I am working with *Anthony on Monday!” Boy, did that exchange loosen up the crowd! Our general foreman was tickled with the exchange. He approaches me and says, “that was good!” From that day forward, the guys were more willing to have chats with me. It was at that moment where I learned that humor was the key to fitting in with the work crew. I experienced my first layoff and had to say goodbye to the crew.

This wraps up Part A, Episode #12 “How I Managed My Early Days In Construction As A Woman”. Feel free to head back over to the podcast platform of your choice and look for Part B to finish the story. For more information, head over to our website at www.ConstructionTales.com. Thanks for listening to us here at Verbally Disastrous and have a great day!

Cheers!

Leslie M. Jasper

-Author & Host of the #VerballyDisastrous podcast now alive on Anchor, Apple Podcasts, Breaker, Deezer, Google Podcasts, Pocket Casts, Radio Public, Soundcloud, Spotify, and YouTube. Other platforms include: Acast, I Heart Radio, Listen Notes, Overcast, Player FM, Pod Bean, Podcast Addict, Podcast Gang, Podchaser, Stitcher, Tune In.

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Verbally Disastrous News Article- On Podnews!

Hello Everyone!

I reached out to Podnews about being featured in their news letter either as a press release or a news article. I am thrilled to discover that my podcast went on as a news feature! Of course I am a subscriber to the newsletter!! I found them on Twitter and Instagram and now following them as well. I am giving much thanks to James Cridland and the editing team at Podnews for sharing my podcast! Podnews is out of Australia according to their newsletter. I am sharing the photos of my news article and the link to the Podnews letter below so you can check it out or subscribe:

https://podnews.net/podcast/1560907872

I used a list of emails, received from Radio Public, to reach out to different locations last week. My goal is to try to get in as many news article & press releases as possible. I am searching to see if I made it to any other media sources. If you stumble upon a press release, let me know? If you are a new podcaster, reach out to Podnews so you can get some exposure as well. I thank you for stopping by my podcast content that comes from New York. I wish you a good Sunday afternoon!

Cheers!

Leslie M. Jasper

When Karen Strikes A Mask Wearer!-A Quora Story By Walter MacBride

Hello Everyone!

I stumbled upon a Quora posed question, “Have You Ever Been Called Out In Public For Wearing A Mask? How Did You Handle It?– by Walter MacBride from Texas. I have to say that when I saw the picture, I laughed, almost howled, out loud!! I found it to be funny and very acceptable. His mask is just as safe as a surgical mask. If anything, he is making the requirement fun. Walter got called out by a “Karen” for wearing the mask. I personally think more people should do this. Perhaps the mask mandate will end sooner when everyone does it? Especially when it appears that half the population is starting to look like a bunch of people doing cosplay or acting as their favorite superheroes. I shall have Walter tell the story in his own words. 😛

“I got confronted by a Karen for wearing my mask. Mayor Sylvester Turner said “Have fun with it” when the first mask order was issued. That’s exactly what I’m doing. Instead of those silly rags that go over the mouth and nose, I use an airsoft mask that covers my full face. The other day I was doing work at a store, minding my own business while I service their extinguishers, wearing my mask. Little kids see my mask and go “Whoa, cool!” and I wave. A teenager even asked me where to get one [That shopping website that shares its name with a South American river]. All was going fine until one kid, maybe 7 years old, sees me and says “Wow! Mommy look!” Karen takes one look at me and launches into a tirade about how I’m scaring her “precious angel” and my mask is illegal and a lot more BS that I didn’t bother remembering. She’s causing a ruckus and getting red in the face. I remain silent and stare at her through the mask, which just pisses her off even more, while I’ve got a big ol shit-eating grin on my face. After a couple minutes the manager comes over and tells Karen she needs to leave. More ruckus ensues, but at least I’m able to get back to work.”

Have you ever worn a mask like the guy above and had a person (Karen) have an issue with it? I would love to hear the story. I am personally over this whole Covid-19 mask mandate. I got vaccinated in hopes that this will help us stop having to wear a mask sooner than later. Are you tired of wearing the masks? Do you plan to wear one in public for the rest of your life? Let me know your thoughts on the subject. I wish you a good Saturday evening and ongoing weekend!

Cheers!

Leslie M. Jasper

“What Disgusts You?”-A Young Woman’s Life Lost To Senseless Violence In Nigeria!

Photo Credit: Premium Times, Victim Vera Uwaila Omozuwa

“What Disgusts You?”– Originally shared by Valentina Kalu on Quora

*WARNING*- Photos May Contain Graphic Content!!

Hello Everyone!

I crossed paths with the author of a deeply disturbing topic out of Lagos, Nigeria. Despite it’s graphic nature, it has a powerful message. I stumbled upon this article recently that was written and shared on Quora by Valentina Kalu. Ms. Kalu received her information from an undisclosed news outlet. I also followed up on the story via checking out more recent articles, such as in Premium Times. I am unsure as to how Ms. Kalu is connected with the victim. My objective is to expose the disgusting males involved. I won’t even call them men since it is not deserved! I cannot believe that this horrendous act on this young woman took place in a church!!! Of all places?!? A church!?!? These criminals blew out the candle way too early on a young, beautiful 23-year old woman. Her name was Vera Uwaila Omozuwa and she was reading in her local church. While Vera was studying, she was approached by multiple males, raped repeatedly, and left for dead. In honor of Vera’s life that was taken way too soon, I am sharing what the “savages” did to her. There is nothing on this Earth that she could have possibly done to deserve this form of mistreatment! It is an absolute abomination, of the most epic proportions, to place any form of blame on Vera.

Photo Credit: Valentina Kalu, Quora & Victim: Vera Uwaila Omozuwa Before The Incident, Vera In The Hospital Post Incident

Photo Credit: Valentina Kalu, Quora & Victim: Vera Uwaila Omozuwa’s Murder Scene In The Church

It has been reported that Vera was the model student, daughter, sibling, granddaughter, or friend any person can ask for in this world. Vera was kind, beautiful, and had ambitious aspirations of becoming a nurse. According to a CNN article, Vera was studying microbiology at the University of Benin. Additionally, Vera was taking theology courses at the Redeemed Christian Church of God in Edo State. Vera also had aspirations of becoming a minister. She would go to the church during the weekday to avoid distractions from her siblings while she was studying. It was ironic that she was killed in a location where she sought peace. After all, she had a care giver personality that was known within her community. It is reported that Vera was gang raped, by multiple males, against her will. Vera was raped and beaten viscously and repeatedly struck by a fire extinguisher during the attack and left for dead. The atrocious assault happened on May 13, 2020 in Lagos, Nigeria in her church. Vera was discovered and brought to the hospital to save her life. Despite efforts to save her, she lost her life eighteen days after the attack on May 31, 2020. Her poor body was exhausted from the vicious assault, the excruciating pain, the massive blood loss, and the major bruising and damage done to her body by the assailants. One could only imagine the horrendous thoughts and fear she had in her heart before she lost consciousness.

Vera has both local and now international groups of people rallying for justice on Vera’s behalf. Despite the large span of attention, those males guilty of Vera’s death claim that she is the one to blame. Can you believe that nonsense?!? They should just keep their mouths shut since it is NOT a good look. Vera was a quiet soul and occupied her free time with reading. She would read at the local church. According to these fools who killed her, she should have stayed home because of the Covid-19 lockdown. To make matters even worse, they claim that she should not have struggled during the rape. There was even a claim that she enjoyed the gang rape!! What!?!?!?!? I thought I have heard the worst garbage on the planet come from the lips of American men. American men are now angels compared to these ignorant fools!!!!! These ignorant males are the reason why their own population of women do not feel safe. If your own women do not feel safe within their society, what are you doing to fix it males?!? They are the absolute bottom feeders of their society and of the entire world. There is a saying in construction, “the best part of these idiots dripped down their daddy’s leg!” These fools cannot be saved from their own ignorance and need the death penalty. What an absolute waste of life, space, and breathe!! These males need to go back to hell where they came from!

Photo Credits: Valentina Kalu, Quora Revealing Various Murder Suspects

According to one assailant male, by the name of Richard Chigbo, since schools are currently closed, Vera should not have been reading. I gathered that Richard does nothing extra to improve himself when the school system is closed. Not everyone wants to do the bare minimum like you Dick!!

Photo Credit: Valentina Kalu, Quora: Various Murder Suspects Making Bold Statements On Social Media

Just when any American woman feels oppressed, take a look at other nations such as Nigeria. I would like to think that not all Nigerians males speak like Richard. According to another one of the assailants, named Wisdom Chigozie, Vera shouldn’t have resisted and she should have begged them to go one at a time and just let them rape her. This has to be the craziest garbage, uttered by males, that I have ever heard!! Yes, I understand that there will be cultural differences. However, this is just callous and disgusting behavior!! I am pleased to share that at least one of the rapists has been arrested. This arrest came after the discovery of the murder weapon and finger prints that were pulled off the fire extinguisher. The Nigerian police have reported a commitment to step up their efforts into pursuing suspects of gender based violent crimes. Vera lives in a country where about 25% of women in the population, all under 18-years old, endure violence. University of Benin students were protesting and using the hashtags #JusticeForUwa and #SayNoToRapists in honor of Vera. I am now putting these two hashtags in my group at the bottom of each post.

Nigeria’s President Muhammadu Buhari called Omozuwa’s killing a “barbaric act” and offered his “deepest condolences” to Vera’s family. Meanwhile, Amnesty International representative Osai Ojigo, speaks on the rape culture in Nigeria. “No matter where you are in Nigeria, in the north or south, in the city or rural, Christian or Muslim, every woman and girl is at risk of rape. Nowhere is safe or immune to this violent crime against women,” Ojigho said. I see that the Nigerian government is being pressured to treat this rape/murder and many other rape cases as a “national crisis” on rape. Additionally, this case received international interest so they were forced to get involved and send out Benin homicide experts to find the suspects. I personally like that they were forced to take this case seriously and dedicate some resources to solving Vera’s murder. I read another news article, from Premium Times on August 26, 2020, that gave a list of six suspects that are now in custody. It took about three months to round them up after police resources were pooled together. The suspects are the following: Nelson Ogbebor, Akato Valentine, Tina Samuel, Mary Ade, Nosa Osabohien and Collins Ulegbe. It is also reported that the suspects have made ‘confessional statements’. As of now, I have not found any further updates. This may be a case that I will look up periodically to see how it evolves within the Nigerian judicial system. However, with confessional statements being made, perhaps the only thing left is to see what will be their due punishments for the heinous crime. Sadly, it appears that this is not an isolated case in Nigeria. There are quite a few girls and women who regularly die at the hands of their male counterparts.

Do you know of any updates on this case since August 2020? I am stunned by the ridiculous claims of the males involved in this heinous crime. Blaming the victim for not resisting or claiming that she “enjoyed it” is just disgusting! They all bring such shame to their families! It is a shame that violence against women is so rampant in societies such as Nigeria. While domestic violence is not eliminated, the judicial system often works rigorously to take violent offenders off the street here in the U.S. We all can make a difference in our sectors within our societies with each step we take. I am super duper against any form of domestic violence. I have raised my two sons to walk away during conflict and to never put their hands on a woman. My sons will not stand by idle while a woman gets assaulted in their presence either. I am proud to know of some other good men in my family and social circle who are against any form of violence against women. I have always also believed that men should be free from any forms of violence as well. People should not tolerate any form of violence under their roof. It is when we all expect better, then a better society will evolve over time. I wish for the lovely Vera Uwaila Omozuwa to rest in peace. May her family heal in time and know that Vera is now an angel watching over them. If you wish to, share your thoughts on this murder case. I wish you all a wonderful Saturday and the rest of the weekend!

Cheers!

Leslie M. Jasper

Reading Quora Opinions: “Has Feminism Made Men Afraid of Women? If So, How?” Part B

Photo Credit: Bustle- 6 Signs That Prove You’re A Feminist

Hello Everyone!

This is Part B of the discussion on men being afraid of feminism. In Part A, I shared with you all 13 opinions from both men and women on the subject matter. I also shared with you 2 definitions of feminism and 4 camps of feminism. Perhaps because of the 4 different feminism camps, that is why there is not just one source of authority to provide the core values and/or tenets of feminism? Now, my next step is to find out the “tenants of feminism” or a set of “core values” for the institution. I chose to just review various sources since I have no idea who is the “authority” on this subject matter. It appears that Melissa and I, on the surface, are technically feminists. It appears that all women are feminists actually. She will get a laugh at this! LOL! I had spoken to her earlier and I told her what I was working on. According to the women’s digital magazine Bustle, there are 6 Signs That Prove You’re A Feminist:

https://www.bustle.com/articles/119659-6-signs-that-prove-youre-a-feminist-even-if-you-think-youre-not

You’re sick of stereotypes
You’re angry about the media
You support LGBTQ rights
You’re sick of women being judged
You would like to see a more fair society
This (1 question) quiz tells you- you’re a feminist: Do you believe women and men should have the same political, economic, cultural, personal, and social rights?

If you follow feminism according to the question posed in #6 above, everyone can be a feminist! It is not as exclusive of a club that I had initially suspected. I referenced Sage Publishing for my second source of information. Sage Publishing produces textbooks for a wide variety of subjects; one particular publication focuses on Sociology of Gender. Sage Publishing was started in 1965 by 24-year old Sara Miller who started the company on a $500 start-up budget in a one room office in Manhattan. Ms. Miller had a belief that social science research can and must play an important role in shaping society. Sage has a 2002 publication that offers six key concepts in feminist theorizing: equality, difference, choice, care, time, and experience. Ms. Miller comes from the second wave of feminism and would be considered an architect of feminism as a publisher. For my third source, The Alternative UK has an article that shares the 13 Tenets of Future Feminism. Here is the link and the list below the link:

https://www.thealternative.org.uk/dailyalternative/2017/8/14/future-feminism

THE 13 TENETS OF FUTURE FEMINISM

The subjugation of women and the earth is one in the same.

2. Future Feminism requires the participation of all people.

3. Enforce a global standard for the rights and ethical treatment of women.

4. Identify biological differences between the sexes, and draw individuals into greater accountability on the basis of their predispositions.

5. Relieve men of their roles as protectors and predators.

6. Redefine the societal roles of women and men in response to present conditions.

7. Advocate for feminine systems in all areas of governance.

8. Build political structures using a circular model.

9. Repattern societies to nurture the resurgence of biodiversity.

10. Feminize male-centric language.

11. Deconstruct the mythology of male spiritual supremacy.

12. Restore the female archetype as central to creation.

13. The future is female.

Based upon the signs and tenets above, it appears that varied interpretations of the feminist movement have been published. I am trying to be fair and search for multiple sources to get content. For some reason, I anticipated the movement being far more organized than what it is in reality. Now the 13 tenets sounds good in some aspects. In other aspects, the crafters of feminism are seeking the government to be involved far more than they should. It asks for people to be held accountable, for all to be participative, and relieving men from traditionally expected roles as a protector. I am not fond of the need to feminize male-centric language. Why not leave well enough alone unless it causes harm? I am in favor of people being respectful to others in reference to their biological identification. I know that not all people agree with the choices of others. They should be respectful and look the other way. People should not be penalized or charged with a crime for failing to recognize a person’s pronouns. Leave societal roles to couples and individuals to define for themselves. I am unclear what role feminine systems play in governance? Is this another way to force rules and laws on people in the name of feminism? I do not want the government up my ass any more than they already are in this day and age. I am sure others feel the same way.

I got the pleasure to read all thirteen of the responses that ran the gamut of content. The first man, named Jeremy Smith, expressed his fear of feminism in such a strong way and spoke about the different tentacles of perceived impact. I am sad that he blames feminism on his fear and/or lack of communication with a woman. Meanwhile, it is either him or his partner who lacks communication skills. It seems foolish to blame a movement as to why you cannot communicate and not the actual communicators. I am unsure why Jeremy chose to speak about being accused of being gay when that had nothing to do with the initial questions? Jeremy then makes a claim that the MGTOW members are intimidated by feminists. I would think MGTOW members just avoid contact with women all together so it is a non-issue. Jeremy then ties false rape accusations to feminists. How about tie false rape accusations to morally bankrupt women? I would think these women who falsely accuse are such a small sector of the female population. Why be so paranoid about a few bad apples? Jeremy then shifts gears and talks about the climate in family court. While the 17% percent requirement from your salary is painful, child support helps prevent a single mother and the child from being on the streets. Once homeless, the government, meaning the taxpayers, pick up that tab. If it is your seed, it is on your dime buddy. Child support hopefully deters men from carelessly spreading their seed and avoiding their obligation. As far as the whole maintaining their lifestyle with alimony, I am with you homie on that being excessive.

John Colagioia is the next guy with a whole hell of a lot on his mind and had a ton of talking points! John went in on the macho old school minded dudes who like to control women then touched on drunk chicks getting raped. I got dizzy reading some of these opinions! I never realized that in order to make one group happy, you must take from another group? There is a lot of sacrificing going on in John’s world. John is cool with a chick being his equal so he is alright with me. You then have Romeo Vasquez annoyed with the questions. Romeo then changes gears and says the feminist philosophy is hardly noticed when done efficiently? Why ya mad bruh!? He then says he is mad at the loud, angry feminist who blames all men for her problems. He then assumes that the angry feminist thinks the absolute worst of each man on the planet and wants ALL men eliminated. He is mad at the angry feminist and wants to throw hands to settle the score in lieu of discussing the issues. I am envisioning Romeo as a Randy Savage wrestler type of guy. Then we have Paul Idson who wants to punch some feminists “into next week”. He is assuming that equality means all of these women get a taste of his knuckle sandwich just like the guys do. So eloquently stated Paul! Dr. Tong is a breathe of fresh air amongst a pile of dirty jock straps! He is cool with feminism in theory and even benefits from the movement. It is safe to say that Dr. Tong rigorously avoids chicks high on the crazy scale. Bravo Dr. Tong! Bravo!

Now I appreciate Lee Johnson Stephenson where he describes himself as a feminist. However, he is setting the record straight on his lack of love for the radical combat boot wearing feminists. I agree Lee that these type of extreme chicks are bad for the entire movement! The next time I am out on the street, I am taking Simon Smith’s advice and looking for those “feminist warning lights” that are on some of the ladies! The most sensible guy in the whole group is Regul Martinez who says feminism is about women so it doesn’t concern him. I am scratching my head on “Anonymous” comment; moving on. However, you have Nun U Biznus dropping gems! Nun is telling “Kings” everywhere to evolve, step it up, and stop blaming women for their SHORTcomings and failures! This is followed up by Eivind Kjorstad, a self proclaimed feminist from Norway, who is dropping the best logic of the entire group! Eivind equates feminism with dropping expected roles and allowing people to do as they choose! Freedom is the best to enjoy under the least amount of rules. Eivind believes the gender gap narrows and people gain a better understanding between genders when the expectations are dropped. In my book, Eivind is the MVP of the discussion! That is until I read therapist and feminist Lois Muir McClain’s opinion. She sounds reasonable and contributes to society via inclusion of the man’s feelings during therapy sessions. She is open to calling out a woman if she is being destructive in the relationship. The last person to make a splash with their opinion is Jeanine Sorenson. Jeanine declares that the cavemen are afraid of feminists. However, she also declares that wealthy sugar daddies love feminists. It make sense to prefer a feminist. A feminist may not be in her sugar daddy’s pocket as much a needy, broke sugar baby. Well, let’s give thanks to Jeanine for dragging her sugar daddy into the discussion.

Overall, it felt like some of the fellas associate feminism with violence, such extreme behaviors, and extreme people. I am sure there are some feminist outliers who want to eradicate men from the planet. However, I do not believe that the majority of them think this way. I am surprised to see a guy speak on how he is going to exchange punches with a woman since she wants to be considered equal. What is wrong with people!?! You keep your hands to yourself. If you can’t express yourself in a well thought out and logical manner, just pass up the question. Some people’s insight was helpful. Some people needed to expand further on their talking points. I find it interesting when men call themselves feminists. I am amazed at how a woman just seeking the same opportunities is met with violence by some knuckle dragger. Then again, fear brings on the need for violence. What do you think about my observations? Do you have one to share that I glossed over? Let me know. It is a Friday evening and here I am writing out a long ass topic to be released. It is now time to get a little more aggressive with my Stoli raspberry and ginger ale beverage. You get a virtual prize if you made it all the way to this sentence. I wish you all a peaceful Friday evening and a great weekend!

Cheers!

Leslie M. Jasper

-The Audio Blog: Verbally Disastrous Podcast & Construction Tales Blog. Now available on: Apple Podcasts, Anchor, Breaker, Deezer, Google Podcasts, Pocket Casts, Radio Public, and Spotify. Other platforms include: Acast, I Heart Radio, Listen Notes, Overcast, Player FM, Pod Bean, Podcast Addict, Podcast Gang, Podchaser, Stitcher, Tune In.

Reading Quora Opinions: “Has Feminism Made Men Afraid of Women? If So, How?” Part A

Hello Everyone!

I have shared several other questions and answers from Quora. I found another interesting question on the subject matter that involves the ‘fear of feminism‘. The research into this subject is much larger than my original estimation. Therefore, I am going to break this up into Parts A & B. This is due to my Anchor platform’s audio recording feature that imposes a limit of 30 minutes maximum. In lieu of just sharing my view, I want to share all 13 responses to the question. I am sharing the male views first, then the anonymous views, then the women’s view on the question are last. I also wanted to dig up some information on feminism. I believe in looking at all sides of a coin. Melissa and I had a chat recently that we both do not consider ourselves as feminists. We both make the strong association that feminism is the most extreme level on the classification scale of women. I am trying to research the parameters of feminism to see if we fall into the category based upon our characteristics and/or behavior. Now that sounds like another topic of discussion! I will offer a summary of my thoughts in Part B. Of course, I can’t help myself. I already laughed at some of the ‘foolish’ responses that I took a peep at before I even finished reading! Now, let’s see what they have to say on the subject:

Opinion #1:

“Oh, boy, yes: extremely so. At least to me and many guys I have spoken to, we are terrified to fully express ourselves around women in a natural, healthy way. We can’t hardly go around or speak to some individual women (the hardcore feminist variety), without them yelling at us for some thought crime. I remember one of these feminists got angry at me like this once because I said in a conversation (how we got to the subject is irrelevant) that I would not like to be mistaken for being a gay man or hit on by gay men. And oh man, did she go off her rockers here. She hit me with the typical “you’re homophobic!” several times quite loudly in front of other people in public, even though I do not think homosexuality is immoral, bad or anything. In fact there are several well-known public intellectuals who I will listen to who are gay. A chief example of men being intimidated by feminism is the MGTOW movement, which advocates giving up on women, in favor of (ahem) other sexual pursuits, as they believe all or nearly all women have been corrupted by the irrationality of modern feminism and/or it is too risky to date women considering the blatantly false rape accusations that have lost many men jobs, gotten them kicked out of college, or imprisoned as well as the staunchly gynocentric rulings in family courts that tear apart a man’s life, finances, and can land him in debtor’s prison for not paying alimony and child support (or again rape/ child abuse accusations that have no evidence). Now I am not a MGTOW, as I believe there is a significant number of rational, great women and that the pursuit of marriage and raising the next generation is fundamental to improving society, but I can empathize where they are coming from.” -Jeremy Smith

Opinion #2:

“Sure, some men. There are men whose identities are tied up in an outdated vision of masculinity. They believe they have a right and obligation to control or insult women. Paying women less because they might one day become pregnant, wringing hands over women voters making decisions based on which candidate is more attractive, and thinking that there’s nothing wrong with getting a woman drunk or worse to take advantage of her. As far as I can tell, they see the world as a zero sum game: To improve the lives of women, the happiness and security needs to be taken from some non-woman source. Their lives must be impoverished to make women whole, in other words. The world is moving on, leaving them behind, so they’re scared. But other men never saw that faux-masculine posturing as constructive, anyway, and aren’t threatened at all. It doesn’t hurt a man to have women be equal, just like southern land-owners weren’t dragged into slavery when their slaves were freed.” -John Colagioia

Opinion #3:

“Well, not necessarily afraid, but rather annoyed. But there’s a reason: There’s a feminist philosophy that looks for equality. You can barely notice it when it’s correctly applied; but it’s effective, albeit in a slow way. I call it the good feminism. I know women that apply it and it’s a joy to be with them. And there’s the feminism that is obvious, loud, and adopted by many, often resentful/angry women, who want to eradicate men from the universe. Everything is men’s fault, every man is a rapist, every man is a pig, and there’s no room for discussion, unless you want a punch in your face. It’s a big annoyance to hear one of those bad feminists, specially when dealing with some trivial, gender-unrelated issue. That’s the kind of feminism I, as a man, hate to hear about.” -Romeo Vasquez

Opinion #4:

“Less afraid if anything because the next time a woman hits me I’m going to hit her so hard she will end up in next week. Before I might have just taken it and played up to the traditional role of you don’t hit women. Now as we are all equal I intend to treat said woman the same way I would treat a man who did that.” -Paul Idson

Opinion #5:

“Feminism at its core does not scare me. A genuine concern about gender egalitarian ideals is very much welcome. In fact, I think it has benefited myself as a “eligible” man a lot more. However, on the other end, women seem less happy than ever!! Perhaps it’s because they have to do more share of the work. That being said, certain feminists do scare me indeed. Especially when they are exceptionally high on the crazy scale.” -Kayee Tong, M.D.

Opinion #6:

“No, as a man who thinks there should be total equality of the sexes, genders etc I would describe myself as a feminist. Let’s get one thing straight though, these women who wear combat gear and call for eradication of all men are NOT feminists. The movement needs to condem these people, they are dangerous supremacists, who have a huge detrimental effect to classification of feminism.” -Lee Johnson Stephenson

Opinion #7:

“It has in my case definitely. It’s better to play it safe and avoid hitting on women who have the feminist warning lights like a shaved head.” -Simon Smith

Opinion #8:

“No, because it has nothing to do with men. Feminism is about women.” -Regul Martinez

Opinion #9:

“You were supposed to fear women unless you think you can violate a woman and find some naive and ignorant 18 years old girls to fulfill your bruised ego.” -Anonymous

Opinion #10:

Men who feel they have to control women are p*ssies! The only person you have the right to control is yourself and your minor child- PERIOD!! Far too many men blame women for their own shortcomings and failings; it’s ridiculous. GTFU! Time to EVOLVE already. Your temper tantrums and ‘king for a day’ BS are getting OLD!! -Nun U Biznus (love the name) 😛

Opinion #11:

“No. To the contrary. Feminism works systematically to remove prescriptive gender-roles, i.e. to allow any human being no matter what gender they happen to be to play any role. This works both ways: women who want to should have the same opportunities for a career as men do, and men who want to should have the same opportunity to be a stay-at-home parent as mothers do. The practical result of this is less gender-segregated, and that women and men get more “common ground”. In societies where women and men have strictly separate roles and interactions are severely limited, the distance between genders is large, understanding is also by necessity poorer. I grew up in Norway, one of the more gender-equal countries. We did everything, at all ages together with scant concern for gender, simply as friends. Why would I be scared of women ? Women, to me, are just people. Some are nice, some are less nice, but that’s equally true about men. I believe that this has made it much EASIER for me to relate to women than it would be for a man from a gender-segregated culture that lacks women as friends and were interacting with women is seen as a suspicious thing to be doing at all unless it’s in certain narrow pre-defined roles such as husband and wife or brother and sister. It works both ways too: Women here in Norway are almost certainly less afraid of men, and better able to relate to them as normal people than women in more gender-segregated cultures. (and they may also have less -reason- to be scared of men, I think both harassment and abuse tends to go up with poorer equal rights.)” -Eivind Kjorstad, feminist

Opinion #12:

“I don’t think it has made men AFRAID of women, but I do think it has made some men ANGRY with women. Just look at the comments on any social media article that discusses subjects such as sexual assault, equality in the workforce, etc, and you will find plenty of angry men saying very extremely vitriolic things about women and feminism. Not all men, of course, not even most men, but certainly a very vocal (online) minority. I consider myself to be a feminist, but I am in no way a hard-line feminist. I really like men and what they bring to the table. I like to hear their perspectives, their life challenges, etc. I think the different gifts that men and women bring to relationships, the workplace, and social arenas are complementary, and together we create a stronger, healthier society than when either sex is excluded in some way. As a therapist who often works with couples, I think some of them, both men and women, are surprised that I work hard to appreciate the values and opinions of the male half of a couple. Some of them assume that I will automatically take the side of the woman, but I am willing to call out a woman on her sh!t when she is having attitudes and behaviors that are destructive to her mate and the relationship. I try to honor and respect the male side of the relationship and create an atmosphere where both of them feel free to share, grow and change.” -Lois Muir McClain

Opinion #13:

“Yes, the dull, caveman types are afraid of feminists. But, the cool, hot, gorgeous wealthy men actually seem to love feminists.” -Jeanine Sorenson

Before we move forward, let’s look at the definition of feminism along with some core values. I have never reviewed the subject until now. Therefore, I am learning much of this as I investigate and write this out. Who is even the recognized authority on this subject matter? I somewhat don’t know where to start. I am going to grab some articles and just run with it. If anyone has any suggestions, let me know?

According to the Oxford dictionary, feminism is a noun and means the following: The advocacy of women’s rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes.

According to Merriam-Webster, feminism means: belief in and advocacy of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes expressed especially through organized activity on behalf of women’s rights and interests.

I am now reviewing that there are four camps of feminism: liberal feminism, socialist feminism, Marxist feminism, and radical feminism.

My knee jerk impression is that the people base their impression of feminism, including myself, on the radical feminism camp.

Here are the core values of feminism:

1.To define, establish and achieve political, social, and economic equality between the sexes.

2. To establish concrete sisterhood.

3. Provide people the courage to stand up for what they believe.

Based upon what I have seen so far, it appears that feminism’s goal is not to harm men. I appears to encourage women to seek equal rights in different arenas of society, band together as sisters, and provide courage to stand up for their beliefs. On the surface, it sounds helpful to women and harmless to men. However, I am quite sure there is more bubbling underneath the surface. This concludes Part A. For the conclusion of this topic, head over next to Part B.

Cheers!

Leslie M. Jasper

Responding To Quora Question On Inviting A Brother To The Break-up Chat!

Hello Everyone!

I opted to go on Quora for some more inspiration for new topic suggestions. As the gentleman from Brother’s Campfire commented, Quora has a mixed back of questions to pull from or use as a reference. I opted to respond to this question from a person, it doesn’t clarify man or woman, who is thinking about inviting the brother to join in and help question the ex boyfriend during the last hoorah discussion. I personally, no matter how good the intention, believe that we must face our own battles. Sometimes, no matter how eloquently the questions are posed, we may not get the closure we seek. While closure allows you to heal, we may not get it and that is okay. I am very curious to the age and gender of the person posing the question. I would like to believe that this is the handy work of a young woman. However, I have been wrong before. Maturity is not necessarily attached to age and gender either.

We are all here to learn a lesson and meet people along the path to that lesson. It is comforting to know that each person we encounter, we are supposed to meet them as per our life purpose. That fact alone gives me closure if an ex cannot offer it during the closing chat. We cannot invite our family members to a private matter. What if you opt to give the ex another shot? In the event that, during the parting ways meeting that your brother joined, turned sour, you now cannot erase that interaction from your brother’s mind. This interaction will not solely stay with your brother either. Your brother’s opinion will now more than likely seep into the rest of the family. You cannot blame your brother since he has your interests at heart and you invited him. Ultimately, you must blame yourself.

Now here is the Quora question that was posed:

“So my bf broke up with me. He’ll be coming over to drop off my belongings to talk & leave. Would it be okay to bring my brother in the room? I need help from my brother Bc he’s good at asking questions & identifying why break up ended on an argument.“

My response that I posted on Quora:

It is not wise to bring your brother into a break-up meeting. After all, having two males in a room with a ton of emotions is not a good cocktail to properly part ways. Instead, pick your brother’s brain with questions he would have and write them down. Those questions should come from you and not your brother. In the event you decide to get back together, your brother will not forget the interaction if it went sour. I wish you luck with closing one door and opening a new door in the future!

I look at bringing a brother into a deeply emotional situation could very well be like inviting a Jerry Springer or Maury type of reaction. For anyone not familiar with my Jerry Springer and Maury reference, they are two shows on television in the U.S. that have been on tv for many years. The show producers drag on the most emotionally unstable and irrational people in the country and broadcast their antics and poor behavior on television. The people may very well have legitimate issues to iron out. However, they are encouraged to duke it out for everyone on the planet to see. If there are no fights, you have women sifting through multiple men on an endless quest to find the father of her child. I find those shows as a vehicle to expose the absolute bottom of the barrel of our American society. With this said, inviting a family member to the last stop on your emotional parade is not a good idea. People make poor choices with their words while under emotional duress.

When parting ways, try to be as calm and peaceful as possible. Try to ask questions that will give you closure. Write out and read the questions out loud to ensure they are what you seek. Work to be okay with what is offered. The ex may not know how to offer the closure you seek. I do not personally believe that I need to get final words from another soul to heal mine. I have the home field advantage since I have worked with all men for the majority of my career. 🙂 In the process, I have gained a better understanding of men. I have saved quite a few fellow coworker’s marriages over the years by just interpreting the emotions and actions of the woman. It was during those jobsite coaching sessions where I learned that some women are very emotional and rather cryptic. Withholding information, giving veiled clues, and making someone guess about how you feel is not healthy. Nor does it give what you seek. Men are not mind readers nor should they be.

Parting ways with someone you love yet is no good for you is such a challenge! I totally understand the frustration of dealing with toxic or noncommunicative people as well. This is why being single is the better option. Once you escape, enjoy those moments of solitude to reflect while they last. Now that all of the single people have been peppered with some Covid-19 concerns in their dating life, dating has earned a new challenge. It is better to fly solo and to not know where you land than to be in familiar surroundings with someone who makes you miserable! What are your thoughts on this topic? Have you ever brought a relative in on a break-up discussion? If so, what was the impact? Was it a smooth conversation? Did you return to the ex? As always, I thank you for taking the time from your day to check out my mixed bag of blog content. If you are guilty of listening to either the audio blog or podcast, I thank you kindly! I wish you a great kick ass Friday and upcoming weekend!!

Cheers!

Leslie M. Jasper

My Response To A Question On Dishonest Women On Quora!

Hello Everyone!

I responded to a question that was posed on Quora today. A part of me felt sad for the person, may it be a man or woman (the post is not clear), that they have been betrayed by multiple women. I have empathy if the person posting is a genuinely good person just crossing paths consistently with dishonest women. On the other hand, if you choose to keep fishing in the same pond and get the exact same fish, you can’t continue fishing in the same spot and expect to get different results. If the person is serious, they must re-assess the approach and switch it up. I acknowledge that I am offering advice with very limited information. My disclaimer is that I am not a professional therapist or relationship coach. My response is based upon my years of relationship experience along with some logic. I felt like this question and my response had value so I am sharing it. I don’t want to always feel like I am promoting my podcast. It is important to mix it up and evoke some critical thinking on the subject matter. Here is the question: “Why is it so hard to find a real and honest woman now?” Now, here is my response that I submitted on Quora today down below:

What an interesting question and how it was crafted. What a shame that the back story is missing. I genuinely feel sorry for you that you have been consistently surrounded by fake, lying women. If you are surrounded by many women with the exact same qualities, you must re-assess. Ask yourself the following: why do I keep going to the same well yet expecting a different quality of water? How am I attracting the same type of person repeatedly? Where am I looking for them? Are you choosing women that you are trying to fix? How can I change my approach to find a different type of woman? Firstly, you must change your social circle. Good women are oftentimes home bodies or busy working a lot. Try a dating app. Can you handle a motivated woman? If they are not at work, they are busy working on personal goals. It will be hard to find them in a bar or night club. You may catch a good woman at the gym, in the grocery store, craft store, Home Depot, the mall, church, the park, paint & sip, etc.

What qualities are you looking for in a woman? Men who solely seek a woman for her external shell will short change themselves in the long run. A good woman is sure footed, responsible, motivated, has a cheerful disposition, actively pursuing goals (has a list she crosses out and adds regularly), and has a sense of satisfaction with her life. Dishonest people are always lazy, lack motivation, have no sense of direction, and want to ride life on the backs of others. I would think you can gauge a person based upon asking about their goals and how are they actively trying to pursue them when you first meet. People who must deceive and lie are lazy, lack focus, always looking for shortcuts, and find a “sucker” to do tasks for them. An honest person is happy taking life by the horns and finding their own way. Good women are smashing goals under their own terms. They are not using their neighbors to compare progress then lie about their achievements to impress others since they either fall short or didn’t even try. A good woman may or may not be obsessed by her looks- it may not be her highest priority. You may have to adjust your standards or be more flexible. Once you switch up your approach, you can spot a liar a mile away!! I wish you luck!! I plan to add this topic to my website Leslie’s Verbally Disastrous Podcast & #ConstructionTales Blog

If you have a different train of thought to toss my way, please share. I am a fan of receiving another angle or something that I may not have previously considered. If you have experience in this arena either as a man or woman, please share. Any suggestions on other topics will be welcomed. In honor of hump day, we smashed half the week so far!! Now we must work on the other half of the week! Thanks for stopping by to check out my jumbled sequence of letters that convey my thoughts. Have a peaceful evening or morning wherever you are in the world! Peace out, cub scout!

Cheers!

Leslie M. Jasper

Verbally Disastrous- Profiles On Both Mixcloud & Anghami!!

Hello Everyone!

As stated before, my objective is to put the podcast & audio blog on as many platforms as possible all around the world. Where it may be ignored in one culture, another culture may find it highly interesting. I do not assume that all cultures will embrace my content. That would be foolish- LOL! My goal is to put in as much effort as possible in a consistent manner. While relatively new at this journey, I want to be prepared to be ready for the future and the next level as much as possible. I signed up both the podcast & WordPress audio blog onto Mixcloud. Here is the link to my brand new Mixcloud profile:

Verbally Disastrous- Now on Mixcloud! See Link Below:

Verbally Disastrous Podcast Profile-Now On Mixcloud!

I also signed up the podcast on the Anghami platform as well. It appears that this platform crosses both Africa and the Middle East off the Verbally Disastrous podcast coverage list. Here is where the Anghami platform is broadcasted: Algeria, Bahrain, Egypt, Jordan, Kuwait, Lebanon, Morocco, Oman, Palestine, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, Tunisia, and UAE. The funny thing is that I highly doubt people from these nations will find my content interesting. However, I am very okay with being wrong on that knee jerk assessment. I am a fan of trying anything once. Especially since this attempt doesn’t cost me anything more than my time briefly submitting the podcast. If any reader is from these nations above, let me know your thoughts? I would be interested in the feedback. Here is a photo of my brand new Anghami profile:

Verbally Disastrous Profile- Now On Anghami

https://play.anghami.com/profile/103695955?bid=/BUqmgeN0qfb

If anyone has any other international platform suggestions, let me know? Yes, I know that I have asked a few times. Don’t worry, I will remind you again. 🙂 I will try to release another solo podcast this week. I know I had my sons on for five episodes. I have to find the right time to get Melissa to join me again for an episode again very soon. She has been busy getting her house ready for the upcoming summer time fun. I know we lounged and watched movies this past Sunday. I did some work on Saturday that made me tired as well. We watched “I Love Dick” over the weekend and it was highly awkward and super cringe! The best thing was the name. I gave an overview of the first and only season in my previous thread. As always, I thank you for spinning the wheel of internet content and stopping on my slice of details. I wish you a good Tuesday evening and a productive week!

Cheers!

Leslie M. Jasper

Sharing My “I Love Dick” Amazon Prime Review

I Love Dick Logo- Series On Amazon Prime (we giggle each time at the name)

Hello Everyone!

I got cozy, in my lounge wear, and sat down with my co-host and best friend Melissa yesterday for a day of tv watching on Sunday. We watched a variety of things since the weather was rainy and dreary in nature. Melissa suggested that we dedicate some of our time to watching Season 1 of “I Love Dick” for eight episodes. The show stems from the novel, that was written by Chris Kraus. The first season was released May 12, 2017. This show was created by the hands of Joey Soloway and Sara Gubbins. On the surface, it appears that the show followed an artsy couple as they embark on a crazy and humorous journey to finding success as Indy film makers in Texas. The title of the season sounds so catchy so I agreed. Melissa and I both think the only good thing about the show IS the title!

Once I dived into each episode, I ran into a wide variety of emotions. For many episodes, I felt like constantly cringing, saying “WTF” to myself often, or feeling awkward on behalf of the main characters in the series. Despite the many cringe moments, we did share quite a few laughs after their antics. It appears that it was cancelled after Season 1. Honestly, we both can understand why since we both considered it to be VERY weird. We both believe that it goes way against the grain of what is normally on tv. On one hand, that is refreshing to not be again subjected to a cookie cutter show. A new sense of adventure is enticing to watch. One the other hand, I felt like it was crazy drama on a high scale. Most certainly far more crazy than I could imagine tolerating in my personal life. Here is a my brief overview of the show.

It didn’t take long for me to determine that the main woman, named Chris Kraus, was absolutely batshit crazy!! Somehow, she managed to marry an older, more calm gentleman named Sylvere Lotringer. We gathered that Sylvere is an artsy guy and got wrapped into Chris for the crazy, kinky sex. Perhaps in the beginning, the relationship was exciting and kept him on his toes. Over time, her antics became overwhelming and seeped into his career in a sabotaging manner. According to the story, she had gotten sick and he married her to put her on his insurance policy. Boy! Now that was a dumb move on Sylvere’s part! It appeared that Chris had some terribly boring film creations. Sadly, she wasn’t self aware enough on the reality of her work. She was convinced that her hard work should be award winning and not painfully obscure in nature. Perhaps, deep down, Chris was jealous of her husband’s rising success. The odd couple were from New York City- go figure (cue my sarcastic laugh)! The couple temporarily shifted to stay in Marfa, Texas so that Sylvere could work on a research fellowship with his sponsor, named Dick (played by Kevin Bacon). I must say that I found Dick to be an interesting character.

Upon Chris initially meeting Dick at a party, there was instant chemistry. Chris mentioned her husband to Dick and he backed down with his interest. However, this encounter caused Chris to develop an absolute obsession with Dick! Chris then went into a tailspin and developed a series of love letters written out to Dick. She shared that she didn’t want to have an actual encounter with Dick for fear of ruining the fantasy. Chris then developed a box and had the letters delivered to Dick so he can read them for himself. The initial development of the letters had given Sylvere a voyeuristic impression that turned him on. In this process, the odd couple breaks their intimacy drought. His feelings shifted from arousal to straight embarrassment upon discovery that Dick actually received the letters. This young person, we couldn’t define as a man or woman, intercepted one of the letters and brought it to the person’s own social circle. That social circle consisted of a bunch of unusual side characters that somewhat fed off of Chris with their own artistic renditions. It appeared that they were all using Chris as a muse. It seemed to give them a sense of community and gave them something to do in their small town. In our opinion, each one of these characters were super odd and added to the crazy dynamics that consists of the flow of the series.

From the point of delivery, it felt like the crazy theme totally spiraled out of control in a variety of different directions. Chris put Sylvere in an incredibly awkward position with his fellowship. The man was mortified how Chris conducted herself with this obsession!! Eventually, they parted ways out of sheer frustration and brokenness. After all, Chris plastered hundreds of copies of the Dick love letters all over the small town. Both Dick and Sylvere got together to share their feelings about the swirling chaos over a bottle of booze. Both men felt embarrassed and powerless that they could not stop or shut down the chaotic drum of nonsense. Sylvere suggested to Dick to have a romantic encounter with Chris. The objective was to diffuse the bomb of obsession. I felt bad for Sylvere that he looked absolutely defeated and broken by this point. He felt like Chris was out there sabotaging his career in the pursuit of her obsession. I am sure he felt that whatever success he was on track to achieve, Chris managed to shatter it with her antics. There was a moment where both Dick and Chris finally got together for the encounter. This was after some yelling and screaming between the odd couple upon the discovery of the men plotting how to “end” the obsession.

Dick ends up romancing Chris to the point of contact only to be met with a handful of menstrual blood. Melissa said that if she was smart enough, she would have dragged Dick into the shower, banged him, and watched the “murder scene” go down the drain! Of course I howled in laughter upon listening to her muse on the end scene! Both Melissa and I shrieked at the point of that bloody revelation!! By this point, we felt like we were watching soft porn for many points during the series. Things have sure changed on what things are permitted to be shown on the big screen over the years! The creators were were a “fluffer” and an under carriage scene away from being a pornographic movie for goodness sakes!! The end scene was the most disgusting and odd scene by far I have witnessed. I do not feel a sense of female empowerment while watching Chris was away with menstrual blood dripping down her leg. Perhaps the end scene was for shock purposes? Yikes on how bold a series must become to keep the attention of the audience! She looked like a hot mess, totally out of control, and no where near a role model or muse to follow in admiration. Melissa and I want to know where is her girlfriend to tell her she was acting like a straight lunatic? She needed a best friend to try to coach her off the edge of the cliff. Perhaps her madness was too much and drove any good friend away?

Let me know what you think of this train wreck? I sure hope the budget was not large for this waste of time. However, the series had enough shock value in it for us to continue watching. Kevin Bacon did play an interesting role in this flick. Dare we say that he was the most “normal” character in the entire series? This was most definitely a retirement project for him. He is at the stage in life where he could risk his career on this mess of a show. Did you get sucked into the “I Love Dick” vortex? What are your thoughts on the characters? The story line? I sure hope that small town of people in Texas are not pissed off with the depiction of their town? Melissa and I do get drawn to odd yet very funny story lines so it make sense why we stuck around to the end. I love to get me a laugh at weird stuff so this series fit the bill. As always, in a sea of content, I am thankful that you stopped by. If this show impacted you from a different culture, I would love to hear the feedback. I wish you a decent Monday and the rest of the week!

Cheers!

Leslie M. Jasper